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Consider your teen's point of view. Listen to what your teen is saying about the rules. If they disagree, let them know that you will listen and take seriously what they are saying. If you are willing to listen to their objections and consider what they are proposing, they will be more apt to negotiate. Negotiating up front is better than sneaking behind your back.

Be clear. Let your kid know which rules are negotiable and which are not. For example, negotiable rules may include curfew, allowance or chores. Non-negotiable rules include such things as driving without a seat belt, school attendance and drinking.

Explain the reasons behind the rules. When teens understand why the guidelines have been established in the first place, they will be more willing to negotiate new rules and take your concerns into consideration. When teens know what you are worried about they are more likely to think about their actions. An open dialogue not only increases cooperation, it creates a teachable moment. Talking about the reasons behind the rules encourages cooperation by increasing understanding.

Encourage teens to present their point of view. Teens who can present a reasonable argument about why they think the rules should be changed are developing good judgment. Thinking about the rules goes along with deciding how to behave.

Talk about consequences. Teens often think, "that won't happen to me." Talking about the possible consequences in advance helps the teen plan in advance. Don't threaten. Give the information and state the facts, but don't threaten. That way your teen can think their behavior through and change directions before something happens.

Take past behavior into consideration. When negotiating rules with your teen, consider past behavior. If they are meeting their responsibilities and making good decisions, it is likely that they will be able to handle the change in the rule effectively. Give teens credit for the good choices they've been making.

Choose battles carefully. Give your teen more leeway as they show maturity in judgment. Don't argue, fight or enforce rules that are outdated. Give your teen room to grow and expand. Let them have more say.

Respect their opinion. Teens are more likely to cooperate when given a voice in the matters that affect them.